Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
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