if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
I want to fling myself into the sun
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Randomize
