butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
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