Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(336): View more from North Carolina

life is too short to starve

(678): View more from Georgia

life is also too short to be fat

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(330): View more from Ohio

no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce

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(734): View more from Michigan

Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?

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(217): View more from Illinois

And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.

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(817): View more from Texas

Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.

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(414): View more from Wisconsin

Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.

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(405): View more from Oklahoma

Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.

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(909): View more from California

Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?

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(336): View more from North Carolina

dude pick up your phone

(1-336): View more from North Carolina

i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything

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