Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
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