Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Randomize
