A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
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