then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
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