no. you can't hotbox the world.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
The only dream I remember having is one where my dad's sperm turned into baby hippos. Like, tiny baby hippos, pocket-sized. I am so fucked up.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize
