come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
Randomize
