It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
This is a mass text to all my friends. Whoever gets this first, please find me and confiscate my phone immediately. I am far too high to have it. Even if you have to punch me in my face to get it. Otherwise, let the "High While Analyzing Disney Movies" texts begin.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
Randomize
