wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize
