Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
Randomize
