I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
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