Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Randomize
