I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
Dignity is for republicans.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
Randomize