So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
Randomize
