My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
Randomize
