why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
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