I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
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