Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Randomize