So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
My breasts were aching with rage.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
Randomize
