Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Randomize
