there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
I swear she didn't look like that last week.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
Need ride home. Girls. Stolen keg. Rolling down streets. Horny girls. No condoms. Rescue needed. girls and beer in exchange for rescue and bacon?
I. Hate. You. Where are you, are said girls cute, and how did you know I bought bacon? And how does this always happen to you?
Smarter than the average bear
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize
