I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
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