Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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