we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
