I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
Randomize
