Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
I woke up with a chicken in my yard
Do you not remember hopping the fence into a chicken coop and screaming "choot em'"like you were on swamp people?
No recollection, can you come help me shut this thing up
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
