His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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