just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Randomize
