Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
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