I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
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