She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
Randomize
