dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
3pm strippers are depressing
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
