She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
