At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
He felt like a one man threesome
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
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