i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Randomize
