talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
Randomize
