so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
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