Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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