i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
Randomize
