Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
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