He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
Randomize
