my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
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