laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
and you fell through a lawn chair
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Randomize