i barfeds in our rink
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
Randomize
