Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
How many fucks given?
0.12846
Randomize
