I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
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