I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
Randomize
